Saturday, August 9, 2014

Feeling Like ...

I think there are a few things I have to do soon. Lately my head doesn't feel right and my body doesn't feel right. I am doing my best to ignore some of it but lately it is catching up with me. I think with everything I have been through the past few years I have never really grasped it all and felt it all the way I should. There is so much in my past that is haunting me and I know I have to find an outlet, a way to get it out of me and say goodbye to it all. I know that not all the hurt I feel will go away because things are not as ideal as I would like (Andy). I also know that it is not what holds me back in anyway. What holds me back is my regrets, my mistakes, my history and I need to move on for it. Otherwise it will eat me up from the inside out and that is not what makes my life any better. I know I have issues and I know that there are some things that I will never have (a father who cares) but I can't live with the feeling that I am not good enough from it, I cannot keep putting my self down and pushing myself because I will break some day if I keep it up.....that is all I have to say right now...guess I really just need a good (girl)friend to hang out with and here I don't have one...but maybe someday...

#BrokenDownMama

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